It ain't working. Forgetting is not easy. I'm like a dang thing waiting to be loved by someone that I love. That's not gonna happen man! Whenever I see HIM online, I could feel the adrenaline rush in my heartbeat. I've never been like this before. I've never been this sick.. I don't know why I can fall for him. I'm so confused! Confusion fills my head now. I wanna see him very badly. But the hell thing is WHEN??? This guy really turns me on. He's not like the others that I've known. He's just different. His uniqueness made me fall for him. Oh dear...

There's just so many things in my mind now. I need to destress myself. I really need a booster. When I'm with my buddies, I smile, I laugh, I crap, I bitch. But behind these smily meany me lies another part of the dreadful me. Sometimes I felt like crying. I made myself feel better by being occupied. At times, being alone is a good thing and it can be atrocious too. Life has not been good to me. But hey, suicidal will never cross my mind. I'm taking each day as a challenge that God wants me to face.

Anyway, I'm kinda thrifty now. I've been penniless these few weeks. No job. What to do? Shopping makes me happy. I just love to pamper myself because I don't like to be envy of others but I don't mind being an envy to people. Seriously! Right now I'm saving to get myself a new pair of sneakers. My old black Converse stinks. Have not gone for a shopping spree for quite some time now. The last time was at the Metro sale with my sister. We really spent the hell outta the sale.

Anyway I better be doing my slides now. Been sitting down and not doing anything but plucking a pair of earphone in my ears since morning. He's not online in fact. Good thing. Because I don't feel like chatting. My mind is everywhere. I can see that my mates are laughing for now. I smile for them. I laugh for them. I don't wanna be gloomy on a bright and beautiful day. I must be strong. And I know I will... :D

Quote - "Live each day with a smile on your face as it brightens up someone's life."

The DIVA whined

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